Growing Up Fast

As a father of young children, I've been reminded by older colleagues to "enjoy them while they are little, because they grow up so fast". This sage advice is usually administered after I've posed a question like, “how did a doll end up in my toilet” or “why don't kids draw on paper, instead of my walls”? For those knee deep in the nappy trenches, with a fist full of baby wipes and the other hand reaching for a coffee, toddlerhood seems endless. And yet, our kids grow up – quickly and before we know it.

So when does the acceleration begin? When do days blend into weeks, months and years? I can still remember the endless days of summer holidays as a kid, where time just seemed to drag on. I was impatient to grow up and now I’d do anything to slow down. Clearly, time does not change. It is our perception, awareness and use of time that develop as we fill our calendars, schedule appointments, set reminders and tick off to do lists.

As the year draws to a close, I’ve been acutely aware of the number of people exclaiming, “where did 2017 go?” and “this year has flown by”. Those commenting seem genuinely surprised, perhaps mournful that they reached the finish line without realising they were in the last 100 metres.

What do we miss as time slips away in the busyness of living?

Suggestions from older parents indicate a sense of loss, as though they wish they’d spent more time enjoying their children when they were young. Perhaps a nostalgic lens helps to smooth over the memories of toddler tantrums, bickering siblings and constant messes that come with little people.

Children require a lot of our time and yet, it was the application of sunscreen to my kids faces (a job I normally avoid) in which I discovered kairos time, ‘an appointed time’. I simply appreciated the opportunity to carefully cover every freckle, dimple and earlobe with love. I am discovering the joy of being slowed down and noticing the small things about my children. Chronos time still marches on, but I am living in the moment, not distracted by what has or will be. Being constantly busy robs us of time, we miss things, we blink and our kids have grown up. If we ignore them and focus on ourselves, then we fail to notice the growth, beauty and presence of God.

Photography helps me to be aware and discover the beauty around me, it also slows my thoughts to observe, be still and appreciate creation. The design elements still rattle through my head, cropping, angle, lighting, composition, but it has become a form of visio divina, ‘sacred seeing’ or using ‘the eyes of the heart’. Interestingly, there are moments in nature or with my kids that I just can’t quite capture. Previously, I would have been frustrated that I’d missed the shot or didn’t have the gear or expertise to capture it. But I’m learning to simply appreciate these moments at the time, as uncaptured beauty.

I couldn’t care less about my watch during these meditative moments of photography, as this time does not equal money. The challenge for me is to bring this practice into everyday life, in the conversations, challenges and delays that life throws at me. I don’t believe that John 10:10 (living life to the full) means filling our calendar with events and activities. I recently drove past a traffic sign that said, “Slow down, the life you save could be your own”.

Perhaps speeding through life can be just as fatal.